
…this photo was taken for Hug a Bear Day earlier this month!
I’ve thought a lot about the futility and allure of collecting a fair bit… especially as someone who appreciates and aspires to minimalism, I constantly go through cycles where I become a bit too keen on anything… whether it be books, Jane Austen, trench coats, or yes, dolls and teddy bears. Sometimes I’m lucky and hold on to a thin filament of common sense, indulging a little bit, but not too much. Then I snap out of it one day, and decide that I must purge… and then I go on an over-compensating selling spree, akin to (if not surpassing, my VBFF would say) Swedish Death Cleaning. As you can guess, either extreme is neither healthy nor sustainable. Of late, I like to think I’ve done mostly well. I went from 406 items on my Amazon wish list to 197 — and this is after a purge 3 years ago that had a starting point of 1002!! I deleted all but 20 items on Etsy, cleared out my bookmarks indiscriminately, unsubscribed from so many newsletters, and sold off 20 dolls that I had just gotten as a lot a few months prior. On a side note… it’s funny how one can cling to a virtual list of items that one manages to survive without daily, but the thought of “just deleting it all” suddenly makes one clutch at it as if they were all absolutely indispensable to one’s existence.
Now, I am simply continuing to list for sale many things (not just my own) that we no longer use, want or need. The difference this time is that I’m not going to sell everything off completely and then replace them when the mood strikes again. Instead, I’m holding on to the meaningful items, and be very careful of any new objects I allow into our home. The other week, my man and I were discussing finances, and he told me, “If you ever feel like spending, just think how you already have everything you need here,”. That really struck a chord with me… how lucky I am to already have almost everything I need, and a lot of what I want already, too.
Another thought that lurks constantly in the back of my mind is a memory… I visited a museum with a friend years ago, and there was an exhibit… I can’t remember if it was actually the shriveled body of an ancient priestess, or a reproduction of some sort but the plaque beside the exhibit detailed that she was buried with all the jewellery that she loved in life. The hollowed corpse was dripping with precious metals, and I couldn’t help thinking how she must have enjoyed it, but it was all useless to her now. We often hear people say, “You can’t bring it with you,” or “Enjoy it while you’re alive,”… and to me, that means not saving the pretty, special things for some far-off elegant occasion, but to use it in the here and now. However, it also means not owning such a massive amount of things that I can’t possibly enjoy it all.
These days, it’s almost the modus operandi to say we need things or do things for our health, when the fact is that we are veering into the opposite end of the scale, which is just as unhealthy for us. The nice news is… the only person you really have to admit that truth to is yourself, and if you happen to be affecting other people, them as well. Then you can quietly go about the business of using this self-awareness to develop yourself into a better person. Whether that means stopping collecting entirely, or being more selective about what you really want to enjoy is completely up to you.
I find it helpful to remember that coping strategies can help in one situation, but not necessarily another. Sometimes it’s better to avoid sites and communities centered around things I’m interested in, while other times I find it therapeutic to just talk so much about it and enjoy other’s pictures that I am satisfied enough with the exchange and can do without wishing or trying to own the item itself. On occasion, I’ve even been disillusioned because I see something I would not like in the item, and I’m able to get over it quickly without even having to have spent a single penny!
It also helps to remind myself and be reminded that I’ve lived so long without ___________, I can go on living without _________. As well, a sparingly decorated/furnished room is not a barren room, but a clean and fresh one, and being able to tidy it up under 5 minutes is such a joy. Who needs a bunch of dust collectors? Another sobering thought is that of all the things that we want and later on realise they are useless, about 80% of them are probably made of plastic, and as we know… is not the Earth’s best friend. I’m guilty of my share of buying useless knick-knacks, and especially with the convenience of online shopping today, think of all the carbon emissions it takes to not only produce the item but to ferry it straight to your door! These days, I think of global warming, and keep my online shopping to once a month if I can help it, so as to hopefully have whatever I need arrive in just one package if possible.
Going back to collecting, these days I have a few special books that I will keep, and am selling off the rest. I’m keeping my bears under 25, and my dolls under 20 (I have 8 bears and am pretty sure I have fewer than 15 dolls). I haven’t bought clothes for myself in months because I’m trying to wear out everything I’ve bought and held on to over the years. Those are my weak points, so I set strict standards for those categories. I will continually evaluate what I own and decide whether they still bring joy or are of use, and if not, off they go to find new homes.
I’m very curious to know… are you a collector?
What do you collect, and how do you manage the sometimes very fine line between the joy of owning pretty things and obsessing over them?